Maybe I over-reacted?

I've been obsessing a little today on the diabetes thing. It's gotten me all bent out of shape and I feel like running away. So I've done some reading and some introspection and I think I may have over-reacted a little. Not that I shouldn't take all this very seriously, but I think I can manage this and it's NOT necessarily a death sentence nor a diagnosis of diabetes.

I think this is me... Idiopathic postprandial syndrome.

Basically, it's hypoglycemia-like symptoms without all the major issues (which is most likely why my doctor was not too worried about it.) It can be fairly easily addressed with weigh loss, more exercise and better eating habits. And by better eating habits, I think it's all stuff I already know and want to do anyway... very limited high-sugar foods (no soda or pie), smaller more complex meals.

This is much better.

This cheers me up.

I can do that.

Eating Better Today

OK, I'm hoping that the episode Monday night was just an issue with my hypoglycemia, since I've read more now and see that hypoglycemia is not always a stepping stone to diabetes.

Regardless, I'm eating better and trying to figure out how I'm going to get some exercise in my schedule.

Breakfast was a breakfast burrito and tea (no coke.) Yes, it's 1100 calories in one meal... but I love it and it's wonderfully complex with grilled chicken, potatoes, eggs and salsa. And a gooey, yummy cheese sauce that probably gums up my arteries... but cut me some slack.

For lunch today I'm eating a banana, and orange and a cup of yogurt. I might get some beef jerky or trail mix later if I feel hungry. The coolest thing is that all this food is provided by my company. We have snack cabinets on each floor with various snacks and sodas. The free sodas were part of my downfall lately, so it just seems right that the snack cabinets should help me eat healthy, too.

Flirting with Diabetes

My doctor told me a couple of years ago that if I'm already seeing energy drops between meals and other hypoglycemia symptoms, that I'm pretty sure to develop full-blown diabetes. It shocked the hell out of me at the time and I immediately started going to the gym 3-4 times a week, ate more whole foods, stopped drinking soda and lost about 40 lbs.

Well, that was like 3 years ago. The last few years I've been fairly pre-occupied with my crazy life and exercise and good eating are things that I've been overlooking. I just haven't had the time.

So, now that I'm back up to a whopping 365 lbs or so, I had an odd incident last night. I've been sick off and on for 3 weeks now and yesterday I just couldn't get out of bed. My head was killing me and I felt achy all over. So I slept almost all day, with a few short periods where I would log in and answer a few emails from work (we're coming up on a release and I'm not happy with my progress at all.) Eventually I woke up around 6 pm and got dressed. I was feeling quite weak and my headache was horrible. I realized then that I had not eaten a single thing all day. So from my dinner with Colleen at 7:30 pm on Sunday until 7:30 pm Monday night I didn't eat or drink, so of course I feel weak, right?

I went to a local Vietnamese restaurant and ordered the Pho Noodle Soup with beef, my favorite. I also drank two Pepsis, which I felt would help my headache since I assumed it was due to caffeine withdrawal. The meal was good and I really spiced it up... it was nice and hot and the broth really cleared out my sinuses. All the fresh veggies were yummy.

Then I got home, talked on the phone a little and as I was on the phone, started realizing that I was having trouble concentrating. After the phone call I got ready to go back to bed. As I was lying down I started shaking and I felt extreme chills through my body. I started sweating horribly and I was horribly weak. I felt an EXTREME urge to drink as much of the Gatorade as I could (I happened to have a 64 oz. bottle of Gatorade near my bed.) I also felt absolutely compelled to eat a bunch of Girl Scout cookies (I had about 10.)

I felt slightly better after drinking and eating the cookies, but was still sweating, chilling and shaking. I couldn't think of anything else to do so I went to bed.

I slept fine, as far as a I know.

The more I thought about it today, I think that was a severe hypoglycemic reaction or maybe even a diabetic event of some sort. And it makes sense... I've let myself go, I've been eating mainly processed junk foods lately and I have drank only soda for weeks. I'm sure I was (and still am) dehydrated and completely lacking in nutrition.

So, I think I'm flirting with Diabetes and I don't like it. Did I mention that my Mom and Dad both have/had Diabetes? Yeah. I'm screwed.

I'm really upset about this but I'm trying to turn that energy into resolve to fix my lifestyle to minimize the impact. Oh, and just because I wrote this on my blog doesn't mean I'm not still in full-blown denial.

Thanks for listening.